LONG...and long overdue!

This is sooooooooo long overdue!!
Well, the Cambodia team is headed back to Portland tomorrow after their two week trip… and if you haven’t already figure it out, I’m not with them. Long story really, but a good one. It starts….well, when do these kind of stories start really, the kind where God’s finger prints are all over things, orchestrating and moving things before we even know, see or understand yet.

I don’t want to be too long winded, but…okay, you know that means I’m gonna write a novel. So, grab a mug, get comfy and here’s my life…

I decided to go on the trip to Cambodia/Vietnam this last summer. Just before I came on staff at Imago Dei Community (my church). I had begun talking with Josh, the global pastor and things were rolling. Then in June, was invited on staff as the Ministry Assistant for Children & Families. This job is something I had dreamed of for quite awhile. Since the beginning of our church in 2000, I’ve been a part of the children & families ministries (Imago Dei Kids). It has been a place of challenge, comfort, community, shaping, blessing, failure, growth and a huge part of my life. A big part of what has made such a place is my dear friend Karen Rogers, who begun, grew and pastored the ministry from the beginning. My relationship with Karen is impossible to put into words. Karen is a friend, a mentor, a partner, a pastor and again and alwasy a friend. She loves people, and I’ve been the recipient of that love so many times. She knows me all, the good, the bad, the ugly and she has walked in and through it all with me these past almost 10 years. And I’ve been her friend, partner, champion and willing volunteer. Anyways, back to the story. Last June after years of Karen and I dreaming about “someday working together” and me specifically dreaming about “someday getting to give all my time to the church” it happened. It felt totally surreal and totally natural at the same time. There was a bit of a learning curve, but really after all the years I had volunteered and led almost every aspect at some point or another of children’s ministry, it was what we had dreamed. So, that journey started in June….with the understanding I’d be going to Cambodia in January with the team. I mean, how awesome, to get to be the church here & there, to be a part of the church both local & global. To learn on my trip and bring back to the ministry here and to bring our kids & families love and heart to the people there… oh chills! ☺ So we’re all set, right? Well…

Insert another strain to the story. Imago Dei has a heart for church planting, has from the beginning. We’ve been involved in a couple local plants over our 9.5 years, have supported plants globally, and planted Imago Dei Vancouver this last spring. About a year and a half ago we hired on a pastor at Imago, Kyle Costello. From the first of his hiring, it was planned that at some point he’d get sent out to plant.. maybe in SE Portland or something like that. That process would probably start in a few years or so. But, God had other plans, things started moving fast…and not to SE Portland, which him and his vegan wife love dearly☺, but to Salt Lake City, Utah!? Sounds crazy, but what you have to know is Kyle did not pursue this, it pursued him and everything has fallen into place like a beautiful orchestra, with highs & lows and resounding notes of “Go”. And so they began to plan this church plant. The other thing you have to know is Kyle was raised just outside of Salt Lake City, a devote Mormon, who’s grandfather is the bishop, until he was about to head out on his mission and wanted to make sure he could answer the questions people had. No one would answer those questions for him, which sent him on a journey that led him to Christ the saving Gospel. SLC (Salt Lake City) come to find out is actually one of the most unchurched places in the country, when you are talking about evangelical churchs…it makes the NW look like the Bible belt! So, why all this back story you ask? Well, when Kyle began to work with the Elders and lead pastors on the plant (Imago is the sending church) they told him that he could ask/take whomever he wanted: leaders, deacons, staff, elders… they said, “go ahead, make us bleed” Well, that’s where the bleeding began.

I was living with the Rogers: Karen (who I mentioned above), her husband Kevin, who is also a pastor at Imago and their 4yr old son Braden (who I of course love!) . Yes, I know, funny I lived with my “boss” and we all worked at the church. We’re funny like that☺ Anyways, I’ve always thought Kevin and Karen would maybe go plant a church and I’d go with them…someday on a beautiful beach when life was perfect , of course (ha)…but I had no idea. In the blink of an eye, in late November they considered going to SLC, talked to Kyle, were confirmed by the pastors and elders and were making plans to go find a house in SLC. I was paraylyzed. Really? What do I do? Them going really just opened it up to anyone going. So, was I supposed to go? There were some long and lonely days of asking that question. Karen was saying, “yes, yes, yes!” but of course she wanted me to go, I’d be trying to get her to go!:) And really there wasn’t anyone else to talk to because we were only days into this, and this hadn’t all been confirmed and gone public, so… I prayed…a lot. I’m an external processor and I often hear God’s voice through others counsel, but sometimes, especially this time, He wanted me to seek Him first, fully and to learn to listen to His voice and gain a confidence in that place. So, after praying listening and spending an evening with the SLC team (the Costello’s & Rogers), then another restless night of prayer, I felt so excited about what God was doing there, how He was moving…but felt like He was telling me, “you’re not going, you’re staying here to carry on ”. It was a relief to have an answer, but it felt a confusing one. What would that look like? Why?

The answer of that question, “go or stay?” resulted in many more questions and mostly, greif! As the days rolled on there was much grief. Not over the staying, but over the loss of friends. These are my people, they are like my family, their son is my little guy. Karen, she sat with me when I confessed my marriage was falling apart years ago, she had read all the last letters I wrote to the man I had called my husband, taking in my questions, my pleading and meeting me as the ink was drying on the final paperwork. I've sat with her after so many of her losses, climbed into her bed on more than one occasion when she was confined to it. She and I have laughed and giggled so many times and joyed at so many things God had done. Not to mention the amazing ministry partnership we had begun years ago and was just beginning to move to a whole new level. And Kevin, He had stood with the men of the church when my husband decided to walk away and had called him back, he had fixed my house and my car and helped me moved, he had protected me. And Braden, oh my B, he is passion and life and hope in a fire ball! He spent the last four valentines days watching movies and having yummy treats with me, and his parents have shared him with me so willingly and graciously. And now they are leaving… big sigh, and crocodile tears. Then the questions of what am I called to now? What does it look like to be in this church now, in this ministry without Karen? What do you have for me Lord?


Well, long story short. I’ve become the Director of Imago Dei Kids (our children’s ministry). Yeah, Woa! It’s like 0-60mph in 3.5! It’s not at all what I imagined when I started working part time last summer. I was just so excited to finally get to work at the church, to get to put more of my time towards what I love. It’s like a dream come true, but not at all how you thought it would be. I'm reminded that in situations like this, I often feel at first confused and frustrated, but then it slowly blooms into something better than our dreams, they are good, they are God’s dreams. I have so much to learn, so much to grow in, but I think that’s all part of it, really, being shaped our whole lives through, while glory is being given to God all along the way.

It’s been a crazy whirlwind of a couple months. I had to move (since the Rogers are moving and I lived there), I began trying to glean everything I could from Karen as far as ministry, though she’s been very kind, gracious and reassuring that I can do this, and I’ve tried to spend as much time with her as I could as dear friends. I said goodbye to the Costello’s who I knew shortly, but immediately fell in love with, and am missing already. And am waiting to see both, who God sends along with them and who He raises up here at Imago Dei. And as of January, have begun my new endeavor, journey, whatever you want to call it.

Back to how Cambodia fits into all this. As it became evident that I’d be taking the reigns of Imago Dei Kids, I realized the Rogers were done on staff here Jan 31st and were planning to pack and head out Feb. 14th. The exact dates of the trip. Hmmm, not great timing kept invading my mind. How can I take this over and then disappear for a few weeks? How do I prepare to be gone when I don’t even know what I’m doing yet? Those were my biggest questions. So, again I prayed and sought some advice… everyone agreed it was weird timing, but that didn’t necessarily matter. So, I talked to Josh (global pastor). Apparently the team had gotten bigger than originally planned and he had been praying about how it could be made smaller, or if that was the right thing. So, when I came to him, that was something to consider in not going. Also, this trip was mostly medical by nature, which I am not medically trained. Though I’d be an asset to the team in other ways, I don’t have that skill set that is the focus. He also shared that he’s currently working to plan a future trip that was focused differently, with aspects possibly more involving the church, kids, families, that sounded right up my alley. And so, I decided not to go. And it was a huge and peaceful relief… haven’t regretted it for a minute. I did feel a tinge of “wishing I was going” when I talked to some of the team and when they were commissioned. But ironically they were commissioned the same Sunday they announced my new position and commissioned the SLC team… and though adventure is awesome, and I often feel pulled to be a part of every single one☺…I have to listen to where God is calling, one adventure at a time. To go where God is leading at this time, in this season, in this moment. I am looking forward to a future oversees trip, don’t have the dates yet, but it’s in the works and I’ll be sure to keep everyone posted.

Wow, that was long, and overdue. I’m hoping that with all the info, you are able to graciously understand why it’s been so long in coming☺ I appreciate all of your prayers, encouragement, and friendships. I am so very excited and hopeful at the journey ahead. I see God doing some amazing things in my own heart, in our church and in the community. He is moving in people, re-arranging things and orchestrating beautify as He always does and I’m so grateful to be a part of it!

Please continue to pray for: my grief in loosing good friends, a focus on Christ’s faithfulness amongst all the transitions, guarding my time with Him, the specific ministry I love & lead -Imago Dei Kids – prayers of thanks for His faithfulness & provision in all this transition, and prayers for continued growth and movement towards Christ, our church here in Portland, and the new plant in SLC.

Here are a couple links in case you are interested in more info:
Imago Dei Community: http://www.imagodeicommunity.com/
Salt Lake City Project: http://web.me.com/kylecostello11/SLC_Project/SLC_Project.html


Love & Peace to you all…
Jen☺